In Wicca, it seems like everyone wants to be the High Priestess. There’s a level of prestige implied in the title, harkening back to The Mists of Avalon and Vivienne with her commanding presence as she ruled benevolently over the Holy Isle. Some people are more impressed with the title than they are with anything else. And it seems that few people truly understand that the honor of High Priestess is bestowed on someone who has done the work for years and years, gained the necessary magickal and mundane experience, and given vows to the Gods. It isn’t a Cracker Jack prize to be collected after you read a few books.
So how do you know if you’re really cut out for the job? And how do you get there?
For me, the journey of priestesshood began at the tender age of sixteen. I had done a ritual in my bedroom and called to Cerridwen to be my matron goddess. She asked me if I knew what that meant. I replied that I didn’t fully understand, but that I wanted to be a priestess and would do whatever work was required to be one. She answered, ‘So be it.’ And that was the beginning of my journey.
At the time, I wanted to be a priestess because I thought it would sound cool or look good on a business card. No, seriously, I was dedicated to Wicca as my path, but I was also young and had low self-esteem, and I thought being validated in my path by others would bolster my feelings of worthlessness and keep me afloat in a sea of perceived shit. I thought being a priestess meant studying all the books, working with a few other people, and being the rescuer when people needed to be saved.
This is pretty much the opposite of what a real priestess does, and I had to find that out the hard way.
Sacerdotal Priestesshood
The oath that a priestess swears is first to the Gods — to serve them, to tell their stories, to sustain them with offerings, to do their work in the world. Even if that work makes no sense. Even if that work is inconvenient. Even if that work will never be recognized by anyone else. The heart of priestesshood is the connection with the Gods. If you don’t have that fully enmeshed in your life, then you lack the foundation necessary to serve the people.
In Wicca, and in some other Pagan traditions, an initiate is fully empowered to sacerdotal priestesshood. They are able to interact with the Gods directly, without the need for an intercessor. What makes a High Priestess different than an initiate of any degree is that they carry out the duties of sacerdotal priestesshood and take on the additional duties of pastoral priestesshood.
Pastoral Priestesshood
The oath that a priestess swears is second to the people — to help them, to guide them, to be an example to them, to champion them when necessary. This does not mean only Pagan people. It means all people, regardless of faith. A priestess works for the good of all, with harm to none. That’s why a good education in pastoral techniques — often translated from the Christian — is necessary to keep both priestess and congregant safe.
Most people, when they think of Pagan clergy, think of people who lead public events like rituals and get-togethers or who have a visible (and often paid) ministry of teaching and advising. This is nice work if you can get it. But in priestesshood, as in football, not everyone can be the star quarterback. The hours are long, the upkeep is expensive, the effort is unappreciated, the work is often inconvenient. But it’s good work and it’s work that needs doing.
Discerning Your Place on the Priestess Path
The first step on the Priestess Path is honesty — total honesty with yourself and with your teacher if you have one. You must be aware of your flaws, your limits, weaknesses, your boundaries. You must know what you’re willing to sacrifice in order to achieve your goal. You must understand your strengths, your talents, your interests, and be willing to continue to build them. You must be comfortable with the idea of being an out witch and opening your home to be a semi-public institution, as your coveners and students will be in and out even outside of class and ritual times and your name and reputation as a priestess will inevitably spread beyond the Pagan community.
If you don’t have a personal practice, you must build one. You must have a connection with the Gods and the Spirits, because otherwise, what’s the point of being a priestess? You would be a priestess to your own vain glory, and that road leads to madness very quickly, for while it is true that we are all reflections and embodiments of the Divine, we ourselves are not the Gods. We do not have the knowledge, power, or experience. We can only channel those things for a short time in our limited bodies. To think otherwise is the very definition of hubris.
Humility and service are necessary for walking the Priestess Path. Put away those dreams of business cards. Focus on achieving the work of your deities, preparing for ritual, carrying out those rituals, honing your teaching materials, and doing the work of teaching others. If you do the work, the phone calls will come — sometimes at 3am — asking for your assistance with hauntings, possessions, funerals, and weddings.
Think ahead and have a system in place for dealing with weddings and funerals. How involved are you willing to be with the process of designing and executing the ritual? What about the before- and after-events? If you’ll accept a donation, about how much will you expect? Or will you have a fixed fee for services?
Understand that you will always be learning, reading, practicing, experiencing, keeping up with the times. The books you learned from may not be the best books out there anymore. The techniques you grew up with may not be the most effective ones. The way you learned might not be the safest way to teach the lesson. And unless you are a formally trained educator, chaplain, or counselor, you will have to teach yourself how to teach and advise appropriately. You will be doing so much reading on the Priestess Path and not only from Pagan books but also from scholarly journals, trade books and periodicals, and Christian-oriented materials.
As you walk the Priestess Path, understand that you can’t go from zero to sixty. You can’t go from Seeker to High Priestess in one fell swoop. You have to do the work of each degree, even if you’re not formally initiated. That means serving as the one who cleanses the circle space, serving as an assistant to a more experienced High Priestess, getting comfortable with leading small rituals, and building up to leading larger and more public rituals. Having a calling to serve can be very motivating, but also very frustrating. Remember that the core work of serving the Gods doesn’t change whether you’re a dedicant or a third-degree, and that the process of learning is your personal Mists of Avalon experience, working and learning and ritualizing to prepare to become a High Priestess.
Finally, understand that ministering to the community at large is not your ultimate goal. Random people calling you up for a one-off help with something will be a rarity. Your real ministry will be with your coveners, their partners, their children, and their friends, as well as your students, your friends, and your connections in the community. Even a small group has a large web of connections that build your ministry and your community.